posted on May 5, 2003 10:24:39 PM new
Fluffy...
The ATV equipment is what I would drool over. Before I moved to this side of town, I had a 12 foot dish in the back yard and re-broadcasted NASA video on all the shuttle missions. There was a group of locals which would take turns broadcasting. Many of the locals who knew how to get their tv sets or vcr's below channel 14 or find us on a ctv converter would follow us religeously. I'm getting the itch again, so when the shuttle missions resume, I may give CNN a little local competition
The light at the end of the tunnel will turn out to be an oncoming train.
posted on May 6, 2003 02:37:29 AM new
If you own it you can put any price you want on it, but maybe you should try looking around before saying these prices are wrong.
If you are basing prices on eBay prices then you need to look around flea markets and shows and see the prices sellers are getting. I buy many items on eBay and resell them at Flea markets and shows and double or triple my money. eBay has become a wholesale market and I like to get retail on some of my hard to find items.
posted on May 6, 2003 08:03:36 AM new
It depends on the item. I go to garage sales to hopefully buy a large quantity of items at a good price, and have done well. I go to flea markets to cherry pick from the inventory, because on the whole most things I see are too high for me to resell. Sometimes I can find something really good that the seller has no idea what they are selling.
posted on May 6, 2003 08:24:24 AM new
ahc3 states it very well. The ebay sellers think in terms of resale on ebay but a collector that hates computers and modems may buy the stuff for their collection even though it's much less on ebay. The prices can't be that bad at flea markets or else flea markets would cease to exist.
I look for great ebayables among the boxes of books and tables of older items and storage locker boxed goods. Most sellers are veteran sellers and have their goods priced at a good price. Those can be given a quick glance. The one time sellers and locker storage sellers get the good look as they have potential to have a good ebayable at a good price. Like the garage sales, it vital to get there early.
posted on May 6, 2003 09:31:41 AM new
I do agree that it's sad when family heirlooms are gone forever and it happened with my Grandma's possessions also. But in some situations the remaining heirs are so distant from the relative that it doesn't matter to them what happens with the goods as they don't want them.
This is a sad story about one father who proudly gave his gold pocket watch to his son when he graduated. It was the fourth generation that it had been passed down to and was in beautiful condition. Shortly afterwards the son got mixed up with drugs and pawned the watch. By the time the father found out and tried to buy it back it was already gone from the pawn shop and most likely gone forever from that family.
Many dealers can tell you stories of being offered stolen goods and for some it can be a temptation to buy them and now with ebay they don't even have to risk putting them out for sale in their shops. I imagine many stolen items have travelled across the country and perhaps the world after being sold on the internet.
But on the other hand, many people have managed to replace items that were stolen, damaged or lost in a fire just by being able to buy on ebay.
posted on May 7, 2003 09:21:51 AM new
I hope it will be some comfort to those of you who were intended to receive certain objects that you were thought of lovingly, even if the item never made it to you.
When my father died, he left nothing to my sister and myself. Not even so much as a fare-thee-well. It wasn't the monetary value of anything he might have designated so much as the confirmation of what we had suspected all along: that we were nothing to him and had probably never mattered at all even before he divorced Mom. As long as a parent is alive you can hold out some hope, however foolish, but once he or she passes, self-delusion is no longer possible.
--
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posted on May 7, 2003 10:20:43 AM new
I no longer want family heirlooms because the burden of possessing them is too heavy when there are others with their hands out for everything. As a dealer I have heard too many horror stories about how families act when people die. It seems that in every family there are at least one or two that cause trouble for everyone else.
On occasion people have sold me items because they were moving or going into a care home and they could no longer stand greedy family members bickering over their trinkets. They have told me stories of never being thanked for gifts they send, never having loans paid back, visits only when money was asked for, etc.
These people end up in nursing homes with no one visiting them but they are just hovering waiting to move in for the inheritance.
fluffy, perhaps your father came from a generation where men didn't express their feelings so readily? Maybe he did care and thought he would tell you some day and the day just never came in time. It happens to many.
posted on May 7, 2003 10:29:14 AM new
I got to witness this first hand with my wife's family - Her grandmother died several months ago, but was in declining health for many years. Every time we would visit her, more and more things would be gone from the house. It got to the point where there were not trying to hide the fact they were stealing, it was terrible. The worst thing I ever saw was when they decided to split up her possessions BEFORE she died...She didn't know, but still, you should wait until the person is dead before taking their stuff.
posted on May 7, 2003 10:41:38 AM new
I think my father came from that time you speak of Kiara...He was from West Virgina and a large family where he was taught the man is always right no matter what and you do as your told ...right or wrong.He was always mean to me and my brother as kids and Nothing has changed in adulthood.My mother was(she passed away 4 years ago) the one who kept us sane...she gave every ounce of love in her body to me and my brother to make up for our dad.I can never express how much I miss her in words.I just thank god for giving me the time he did with her.They were married over 30 years...My father has a new woman now (only waited about 7 monthes after my mother died) This woman went into my mothers things took what she wanted and then called Salvation Army to come get the rest....I saw the truck as it was pulling off from the house...I walked next door and asked my father what they had picked up and he said all of momma things from the back 2 room ....WHAT !!! omg why didn't you tell me to come get what I wanted before they came...his answer was ...we needed the tax deduction....I haven't been able to look him in the eyes since...how cold was that for him to let all our memories drive off for a tax deduction.He is 65 now so I guess he'll never change.Makes you wonder how bad his life was as a child.
posted on May 7, 2003 11:30:35 AM newI no longer want family heirlooms because the burden of possessing them is too heavy when there are others with their hands out for everything.
I kind of agree with you, Kiara. My branch of the family is small. Through the years my ancestors have collected some neat things.
My grandmother loved jewelry. Actually, all the women in my family love jewelry except me. I will admit that, I like to look at shiny things. My grandmother had some VERY shiny things.
Imagine my family's shock and dismay, when my grandmother started giving me jewelry when I was in my early teens. Imagine their shock and horror, when after she died they got up the nerve to ask me about some of the pieces and I told them off.
I gave them my stardard foul tempered reply and they have rarely mentioned the jewelry since.
The problem is, I honestly don't know where most of it is. I am sure I have it. I don't throw anything away. I just haven't seen it in around 16 years.
Partial list of missing items:
3 or 3.5 (don't remember which) carat pear shaped diamond in a platinum band.
Solid white gold watch. Over a 100 years old, I think.
Huge yellow diamond, set in white gold.
Sappire necklace.
Diamond bracelet.
Diamond encrusted watch.
Diamond and emerald necklace.
Tons of bakelite stuff. And much, much more.
My grandmother knew I didn't like jewelry. She just didn't want them (my cousins, aunts and her daughters) to have it. I was her favorite.
Since I have no children, I am sure they expect my loot to returned to the family pot eventually. Boy, are they wrong. MUHAAHAHHHHAAAAHAHHAHAAA!!!
posted on May 7, 2003 11:43:56 AM new
shop4shoes.
may be they are with your banker,thats why they gave you the mortgage no matter what paypal receipts you bring them!!
posted on May 7, 2003 11:55:50 AM newmay be they are with your banker,thats why they gave you the mortgage no matter what paypal receipts you bring them!!
Are you still harping about paypal? I don't even accept paypal anymore and when I did it accounted for very little of my customer's payments.
As for my banker. I don't have one. I have banks. I am not on a first name basis with anyone at any of them (wait, I am with one chick at one branch). They are there to take my deposits, be resonably polite, and not give me trouble when I want to withdraw money.
I would not trust them with any jewelry. They may "reverse" the transaction.
posted on May 7, 2003 12:00:28 PM new
The situation with my sister in law was more of an inadvertant mistake than greed. But my siblings and I are very acutely aware of what can happen in inheritance fights.
A few years ago my parents, my siblings and any current spouses sat down and wrote out what we called a "family compact." It's not a legal document but it is an agreement that basically says "There will be no fighting over stuff."
The funniest thing we realized was this: The danger point was not in divvying up the property, vehicles, furniture and jewelry. It was the little things, like the beat-up brass sugar scoop and the tarnished baby spoons, that we probably would have been coming to blows over. We basically asked Mom and Dad to allocate anything that was in that house before 1985, and she says they actually had a good bit of fun doing it, with little narratives about why X item is going to Y child.
The most important thing, though, was that we all agreed in advance that nothing can be disposed of by anyone until this agreement is settled. I really hope it works.
posted on May 7, 2003 12:06:18 PM new
many oldies have resorted to selling their belongings to pay their bills,once they past away,their heirs are surprised many of the items they are expecting have long been sold.
posted on May 7, 2003 12:23:31 PM newmany oldies have resorted to selling their belongings to pay their bills,once they past away,their heirs are surprised many of the items they are expecting have long been sold
Yep. They also give them away to people that are nice to them when their own families aren't.
I have seen some vicious fights over estates. I have seen people loot homes, while their relatives are in the hospitial. It is sad.
I think the reason my elderly relatives wnat to give me stuff, is they know I don't want it. I am going to be nice or nasty, it depends on my mood and the situation and money will not change that. Old people hate brown-nosers anyway.
posted on May 7, 2003 01:40:37 PM new
This is an interesting discussion!
My husband's elderly aunt died, no children, a few years ago and we were designated to dispose of her lifetime accumulation (mostly purple stuff!).
We lived in another state, so we went to her town, saw to the funeral and burial, went through her documents with the executor, and set to work. You know the triage process--garbage (painting on velvet, 200 plastic bowls), thrift shop, KEEP, transport home to sell on ebay, etc. etc. And of course offer things to family members.
We had worked for a week, arranged for a mover to come and pick things up after we left, packed our bags ready to leave the next day. An old friend of the aunt's came by, looked around and asked if we'd checked with the consignment shop. What consignment shop, we said. Well, we dug down into her accumulated papers and found a list of things she'd consigned to an antiques dealer.
When we went to that shop, we were amazed. A lot of the old treasures had been sold by the aunt (fearing she'd run out of money, although she never would have), but there was a ton of stuff left--Haviland china set for 12, pink etched wineglasses, etc. etc.
What was so scary is that we *might* have seen that consignment sheet at some point, maybe years later, but it would have been too late, probably.
I just wonder how often that happens--that old people die and the shop doesn't know or doesn't want to know, and the items are sold, with all the profits going to the shop dealer.
posted on May 7, 2003 03:22:20 PM new
I don't take items on consignment because I don't want want the responsibility of taking care of other people's things.
But I think it happens often where the elderly leave their items in good trust and the family never sees the papers like you happened to, roadsmith.
One elderly lady moved here from another city and told me she put all her antiques on consignment in a shop in the town she moved from and the dealer folded and was gone overnight with all of it so she lost everything.
toasted36, that's a very sad story and I'm sorry it happened to you.
shop4shoes, someone gave me an item from my Grandma because they wanted to make sure I got it and another family member has designated its future owner because I'm not the oldest so I laughed when I read your comment about things being "returned to the family pot".
Many elderly people give treasures to special friends and neighbors because they receive more kindness and love from them than their own family and that's the way it should be.
ahc3, what you mention happened in a family I know. They cleaned her out entirely while she was on her death bed in her own home.
It would save a lot of grief if all families had agreements like you mention, msincognito. But I don't think that many of them even realize that family members can be as greedy and cruel as they are at times.
posted on May 7, 2003 07:28:13 PM new
My parents are from the UK and all our/ their family is still over there. My mom is one of 17!! children. But I only have one sibling. When I was a kid, I always wished for a large family HERE, full of siblings, and even though we visit a couple of times every year, I missed the cousins, aunts and uncles living over seas. After the stories I have heard over the years concerning families, love, loyalty, possessions and MONEY......I know better now. Sometimes bigger isn't better.
posted on May 7, 2003 07:56:58 PM new
I do hundreds of antique malls/stores and quite a few flea markets monthly. Once in the antique mall I will scan almost every shelf side to side from top to bottom since there must be at least 1 item in the mall that's underpriced. I bypass all booths that specialize. If someone is selling all Fiesta they have the Fiesta Price guide and they expect to get book price. The gem will always be found in the casual seller's booth.
At the flea market I always go early and start with the day sellers. First word about "It's in the book for $200" I am outta there. "My son can sell it on Ebay for $100" usually means "He bought it on Ebay for $10 so I have a lot of haggle room."
posted on May 7, 2003 09:48:08 PM new
I think when it comes to heirlooms, the best bet if possible is to deal with the matter ahead of time. My family has very few heirlooms but one of them is "The Christmas China".; I have been hearing "The Christmas China" story since the beginning of time. Multiple generations, every year a piece is added, yadda yadda yadda, always ending with... "someday it will be yours".
Imagine my surprise when, when my mother asked what specific items I wanted earmarked for me in the will, I glibly mentioned the china and she informed me she was thinking of giving it to my step sister. I threw a ranging fit. I love my step sister but those last three generations were not her family, she never lived with us and damnit - she never had to go thru the story of the china as she unwrapped and hand washed every piece on Christmas Eve or again as she again hand washed and rewrapped every piece Chistmas night.. My mother informed me that since I had expressed no intention for children I would have no one to hand it down to so she thought that the SS would be a better choice (never mind that she is 3 years older with no kids either). I told her that I would leave the piece to the SSs kids is she ever had any but if she left those dishes to anyone but me I would make sure that her funeral looked like a lilly factory (her most despised flower) and ban the singing of Amazing Grace (her favorite song) She just looked at me and laughed. I'm getting the china.
posted on May 8, 2003 12:44:10 PM newif she left those dishes to anyone but me I would make sure that her funeral looked like a lilly factory (her most despised flower) and ban the singing of Amazing Grace (her favorite song) She just looked at me and laughed. I'm getting the china.
And I thought I was bad.
I have a wealthy, foul tempered, aunt who is in her 80's. She never had kids, so my family is drooling at the prospect of looting her estate. She hates them all, except for me and a cousin. My favorite cousin. The only reason we think she likes us is, my cousin and I are nearly as foul temepered as she is and we ignore ALL of her BOGUS health complaints.
Certain members of my family are always trying to do stuff "for her". The more they kiss her butt the more she despises them. They think that she likes them. Poor, poor, deluded souls....sigh....
posted on May 8, 2003 12:52:48 PM new
i dont have any of the problem as my mother think she is in her late twenties and everyone around her is old ,
she has many years to look forward to enjoying her jewelry
posted on May 8, 2003 01:36:34 PM new
Shops - I admit it - I am an evil sarcastic wench with a unique sense of humor but since I got it all from my mother it doesn't bother her in the least. She just laughs at the new heights I have taken the family legacy
