posted on June 15, 2004 05:15:57 AM new
I Know That this Community Board is the venting area for a large group of you, and that you have developed friendships with each other over time, but I must tell you that it is now my second experience that you also are not wanting any new interaction from someone not in your group, I feel like an outsider is not welcome here except as a target for humiliation, I have tried in the past couple of weeks, once in starting a thread on a question, and again last night in joining in on a thread only to be cruelly shot down and attacked, ( I did notice this morning the person had removed what he said in the thread),I guess there is really no answer to this and I will not try to participate here again, so this is just my Chance To Let some of you Know That you have succeded in chaseing me away, if you want this as your Private Sandbox, You can Have IT! I will not be back, as you did your job of making me feel like I was Invading your space, Thanks For that....
Please don't take those voices from the trailer-park wilderness personally.
If you had looked through past topics, or just read this board for a while, you would have seen that just about every conceivable eBay topic has been covered (some multiple times). While they all get discussion, the pros/cons are usually the same each time, no minds are ever changed, and lately, they seem to degenerate into political or social activisim discourses.
Having a new topic appear was just like throwing fresh meat to the lions, and they couldn't help themselve. Within 30 minutes of your current sign-off post, you will probably get the usual "well you can just ignore if you don't like it" posting. This is usually delivered by someone who never follows that particular piece of advice themselves.
If you think your treatment was bad, go look at some of the round table posts (you will probably feel like you need a shower after wallowing in those).
I participate in the Round Table board quite regularly (as Tom and Ralphie will attest - Hi ya, Ralphie!) and believe me when I say this board is like tiptoeing through the tulips compared to the walk through the bramble bushes you take in the Round Table. LOL! I agree that sometimes things are said that could have been said a better way, but I wouldn't take any of it personally. You may be attacked one minute and befriended the next. It took a lot of posts from me to even get recognized and even then I still get it from time-to-time. The only one who doesn't is Ralphie because he's too cute and we all figure Tom gives it to him enough.
We love having new people join here. It keeps the board from getting stale. You are invading no one's space. This board is big enough for all of us. Personally, I'm sorry that someone offended you.
Edited to add: People who post nasty comments and then erase them so no one else can see how awful they are, are cowards in my book. Consider the source and move on.
Cheryl
[ edited by CBlev65252 on Jun 15, 2004 07:08 AM ]
posted on June 15, 2004 07:17:14 AM new
some people are just mean.
what you should do is FIGHT BACK!!
-sig file -------we eat to live,not live to eat.
Benjamin Franklin
posted on June 15, 2004 07:35:12 AM new
I agree with Cheryl. And I'd like to add that, if you tabulate the "mean" posts, you may see that some of us don't get mean and others consistently get their buttons pushed.
I know how you feel about the closeness on this board. When I first started selling, I'd go to the pottery and china boards, ask a question, and then I'd usually be completely ignored. People were chatting about what they'd had for breakfast, what they bought at the mall, etc. etc., and I felt that I was unwelcome there.
We regulars here don't mean to ignore new people or make them feel unwelcome. However, as Cheryl says, there are some topics that come up over and over again.
If you need advice on anything technical, try the Vendio service boards first and preface your title with "Moderator:" They're very good about helping.
But don't go away. We need new viewpoints.
___________________________________
As I've matured, I've learned . .
#2. . . that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the butt are permanent.
posted on June 15, 2004 07:39:45 AM new
Stay with us please, we need more nice people like you! I have the cold black heart of a used car salesmen.(retired) My favorite hobby is winding people up and watching them spin. This board is actually helping to bringing out my feminine side!!!
posted on June 15, 2004 07:49:08 AM new
doris, its an initiation rite or something...just like skull and bones...hahaha.... You're really not singled out - its an equal opportunity hat box. (I'd say soap box, but then you dont get to see how even the smartest of the posters fall through one every now-and-again. )
Your only cause for worry is when (*they that dues*) start messing with your auctions. Then you know You've reached - because some silly self-important troll behind a computer monitor is feeling impugned.
So hey, read some of my posts if you feel bad - that should cheer ya right up!! lol
And go sing "my girl" to yourself. You're youre girl-right??
... Have some sunshine on a cloudy day....:P
posted on June 15, 2004 07:49:10 AM new
This board can be mean-spirited, yes. There are some posters you must learn to take with a grain of salt or just ignore altogether.
However, in all fairness, you have only been treated unfairly or "meanly" in the one thread, your "Seller will not honor high bid" thread. And there you will notice that you had your defenders, as well.
In your "Image Problem" thread Ihula and Neglus were very helpful to you. In your "eBay Store" thread ferretbee and HerbsCraftsGifts helped you. In your "Do You Defend Yourself" thread Fluffy, Kiara and Pelorus helped your or gave nice responses.
As for last night, you posted to the "Fraudulent Buyer" thread for the person to check out eBay's rules on unwelcome buyers & provided the URL, and frankly no one replied to your particular post so I don't see where you got "shot down" as you say.
edited to put some spaces where they belong. Darn keyboard...
____________________
We are not afraid to entrust the American people with unpleasant facts, foreign ideas, alien philosophies, and competitive values. For a nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. -- John F. Kennedy
[ edited by bunnicula on Jun 15, 2004 07:52 AM ]
posted on June 15, 2004 07:56:22 AM new
Mean? All the little angels that post here mean? nawwww... even ugly dogs are allowed here... and Ralphie is about the ugliest dog I have ever seen... but hey its a dog so you gotta love'em
posted on June 15, 2004 08:03:49 AM new
doriseb - Sorry I missed all you postings. But I will agree it takes a while to get to know the people and when you do you will see things in a different light.
This is a very helpful board as I needed much help yesterday because of this dumb computer and they came to help which I appreciate very much.
It's hard coming new to a discussion group as I have found out, (I'm not going to say anything about that) but after awhile you become seasoned and everything works out.
When someone new comes to a discussion board they do not know how many times a question has been asked so some posters really get testy so you just have to disregard them. Tom is always a pretzel choker and Ralphie is cute. Stay around things will get better.
posted on June 15, 2004 08:16:02 AM new
hi doriseb:
..yes, sometimes you exit this forum feeling like the only survivor at the little big horn;;; let me quote....
"this thread exposes a few horses asses."
-----------------------------------
..but the good of the forum far outweighs the name calling and other, less than correct, description of posters.
-------------------------------------
..you can learnlotslurkn...AND you can profit from participation..
---------------
..in reading the above theads, i disagree with most about the clique; even tho it seems to materialize in the threads...people with same opinions are gonna coalesce...opposing are gonna polarize.
-------------------
..and, no matter the view of each...this is an evident truth;; that this forum is made up of people who are intelligent, hard working[i think], and whose personalities are as strong as battery acid...this is the catalyst, not just for dialogue, but for DEBATE-which many times goes off on tangents of verbal fisticuffs...
i dont write any of this to defend anybody, myself included.
posted on June 15, 2004 08:35:00 AM new
doriseb >> Not meaning to belittle your experience here in any way, but I think you need to develop a little thicker skin. As in any situation, the majority of the people here are great! They are very helpful, friendly, and most of the time funny! Don't let the few ruin your time here.
"Who's tending the bar? Sniping works up a thirst"
[ edited by koto1 on Jun 15, 2004 08:35 AM ]
posted on June 15, 2004 08:56:18 AM new
Doris -- Sorry that I missed your last post. I've been so busy working. I believe I wrote to you privately the last time. Please don't let them get to you. I have been verbally beaten, kicked and rolled into the gutter more than a few times on this board, but I never let it stop me from participating. Why? For one thing, because without being verbally beaten, kicked and rolled into the gutter, they probably wouldn't have gotten their point across as well. But for another, I would never be where I am today with my Ebay business if it wasn't for this community board.
So, take it all with a grain of salt and continue to learn. This board has many ebay veterans who can really help you with your business.
posted on June 15, 2004 09:04:25 AM new
yeah,i have coffee and a piece of Italian bread-Il Panettone for breakfast ,then i move on to pot roast ,wide noodles for lunch,then crunchy peanut bar for desert.
i eat from 7 am to 6 pm ,so you see thats not really a lot of time to eat all i want to eat.
so happy eating,all of you.
I paid 5.95 for my Italian Panettone,not a bad deal.
-sig file -------we eat to live,not live to eat.
Benjamin Franklin
posted on June 15, 2004 09:25:39 AM new
Doris..I hope you don't "run away". I know I wanted to after my first post until some kind person emailed to tell me not to take the mean stuff seriously (this was possible because I use my eBay name here).
Many personalities become apparent after reading this board long enough - most are not mean spirited and often the postings are attempts at humor. The "Golden Rule" does not seem to apply. The important thing to remember is that all of this is not PERSONAL and should be taken with a humongous grain of salt.
I know that this board can seem "cliquish" but I haven't worried about that sort of thing since high school. I have my own set of friends in "real life". There's still much to be learned and the board dynamics shoudn't make a difference.
There are some threads, ie: Goodbye mr president" (or whatever it was called) that are better left ignored unless you feel particularly combatant. I know the whole thing wearied me after the first reading.
This board is not monitored, so basically anyone can post whatever he/she wants here. The plus side is that posters are free to post about services that might be in competition with Vendio and we all can learn - the minus side is that a lot of stuff is junk.
For the most part, folks here are extremely helpful and come from many different areas of expertise. Lately I've looked at other boards (ie: eBay store board) and most of the main posters (wow! you'd think that they were experts) have less than 1,000 sales (and they mostly use their real id's so people can see their stores)...lots more experience here and most posts are not ignored.
posted on June 15, 2004 10:36:38 AM new
Bunnicula or anyone! - question: (I'm fairly new too!) ... how'd you do a search on all one person's postings? I've been trying to figure it out, and cant find it anywhere on the board. Cant find how you search in the community boards at all.
posted on June 15, 2004 10:46:35 AM new
Just what were referring to damriscotta by the trailer park wilderness?? Now I feel like I am being picked on. Of course you didm't know I live in a Senior Park. Really just joking. I have to agree that we don't always see eye to eye, but if you need an answer to a problem, this the place to get answer on almost any question asked. OVER ALL THESE ARE A GREAT BUNCH.
[ edited by sanmar on Jun 15, 2004 10:06 PM ]
posted on June 15, 2004 12:17:34 PM new
ROM8: how'd you do a search on all one person's postings? I've been trying to figure it out, and cant find it anywhere on the board. Cant find how you search in the community boards at all.
Well....actually you can't anymore, not on Vendio anyway. But Here is a link to the old AuctionWatch board (as Vendio used to be called) that still exists in the ether & which still lets you search even the new Vendio boards:
go to the bottom of the page and look to the left and you will find the Search button. Type in the words or name you want to search for. Be Sure to click on the "also search msg. ctr." underneath it. Then click "go" or press enter on your keyboard. Voila!
____________________
We are not afraid to entrust the American people with unpleasant facts, foreign ideas, alien philosophies, and competitive values. For a nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. -- John F. Kennedy
posted on June 15, 2004 12:26:30 PM new
Thanx! I thought I was losing my mind ..... I never realized they just dropped the Search. Wonder why they dont reinstate it? Very helpful tool.
posted on June 15, 2004 12:33:36 PM new
Doris, welcome aboard. most of us are nice most of the time. but some of us "never me" are mean more of the time than others.
look at it this way. if you are mad at the hubby or the kids or your boss, you can come here, pick a thread and let loose! beat up on someone who can't physically hit back. then run like heeeeeeellllll!
seriously though, if you need any help, the people on this board will do their best to give you the info you need.
posted on June 15, 2004 12:49:25 PM new
most of us pick on the thread,not the person behind it,but there are a few and i am not going to name names who pick on the person,no matter what he/she said.
Some sellers are under a lot of stress and put in a lot of hours,but this is not a place to use any of us as punchbags.
-sig file -------we eat to live,not live to eat.
Benjamin Franklin
Do what I do - tell all of those who are mean to you to: BITE!!!!!
I've been around a long time and let me tell you I've been beaten up pretty badly myself as have most on this board. However, stick around awhile and you'll find yourself getting a bit testy sometimes as well. Sometimes we humans forget that the universe does not revolve around us (even you fluffy) and we tend to get just a bit irritated when having to repeat ourselves or we see situations that to us are really easy to figure out. We all tend to forget sometimes that there are newbies out there who don't have a ton of experience and haven't risen to the level of being punch drunk from being beaten on by buyers (or sellers).
Stick it out - toughen yourself up. If you can't take the beating you sometimes get here, then the buyers you deal with are going to eat you alive.
alldings: having been in the car business myself for 20 years I know exactly what you mean. Wind them up and watch them spin!!!
posted on June 15, 2004 02:30:28 PM new
I have never thought as this place as mean spirited place. In fact this is the only place I come to because everyone is cool and helpful. Years ago when I got my first neg I went over on the boards located at the "BIG E". Non paying bidder leaves me a neg. I went on there to find out if there was anything I could do about it (like I said I was new at Ebay). Well the replies I received were so nasty in tone. I never went back there. Recently I decided to take a look and IMO it was still a useless and mean spirited place.
Almost every public forum will have it's bully or "doom and gloom" person. There is a neat feature on here called IGNORE. I have only used it once in four years.
posted on June 15, 2004 02:53:47 PM new
Hi Doris...to a degree you are correct.
Some people who post are negative, hurtful, jealous and immature.
Since, they are readily identified...ignore them. If you follow some posts, many people do...just brush them off.
On the other hand, there are some knowledgable people visiting the board. Good insights, or questions...and are mature enough to discuss without calling names.
Those people have a maturity to disagree without name calling, or remarks showing their insecurity.
So hang in there...its not that important.
posted on June 15, 2004 05:42:05 PM new
I agree...THIS board is very informative! And, for the most part, very pleasant....
If you are thin-skinned.....avoid the Round Table!!
I've gotten ALOT of help here!
And been called a few names on the other..(nothing too bad...I've got two ex-husbands that called me worst..like being a B**CH is a bad thing! I'm kinda proud of it!..lol
posted on June 15, 2004 05:54:16 PM new
Not at all. these people have helped me in many ways. I learn from them every day and they are most cooperative.
Sniping works up a thirst"
I thought I was losing my mind ..... I never realized they just dropped the Search. Wonder why they dont reinstate it? Very helpful tool. 
are mean more of the time than others.
