posted on August 3, 2003 01:07:44 PM new
One day while passing a nursing
>home I noticed 6 old ladies lying naked on the grass. I thought this
was a
>bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store.
>
>On my return trip, I passed the same Nursing Home with the same 6 old
>ladies laying naked on the lawn.
>
>This time my curiosity got the best of me and I went inside to talk to
the
>manager.
>
>"Do you know there are 6 ladies laying naked on your front lawn?"
>
>"Yes," he said. "They are retired prostitutes and they're having a
yard
>sale.
posted on August 3, 2003 01:43:28 PM new
Okay, twelvepole...don't know how old this is but here goes:
Pfizer Corp. announced today that VIAGRA will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer.
It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of" "MOUNT & DO."
posted on August 4, 2003 09:56:43 AM new
An Irishman, an Italian and a Polish guy are in a bar. They are having a good time all agree that the bar is a nice place.
Then the Irishman says, "Aye, this is a great bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there's a BETTER one. At McDougall's you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and McDougall himself will buy your third drink!"
The others agree that sounds like a great place.
Then the Italian says, "Yeah, that's a great bar, but where I come from there's a BETTER one. Over in Brooklyn, there's this place, Vinnie's. At Vinnie's, you buy a drink, Vinnie buys you a drink. You buy anudda drink, Vinnie buys you anudda drink."
Everyone agrees that sounds like a great bar.
Then the Polish guy says, "YOU THINK THAT'S GREAT???? Where I come from there is this place call Warshowski's. At Warshowski's they buy you your first drink, they buy you your second drink, they buy you your third drink, and then they take you in the back and get you laid!"
"Wow" say the other two. "That's fantastic! Did that actually happen to you?"
"No", replies the Polish guy, "but it happened to my sister."
