posted on November 1, 2000 11:13:44 AM new
Hellllllo there, folks. Havent been herei n awhile, and ran across a ponderment that was interesting. Today, on Moral Court, a man and his wife were on, he complaining that the wife was degrading their two year old daughter because she put the child on a leash when out in public. Compounding the issue was the fact that it WAS a leash, not a halter made for children, although both are similar in looks and how its attached (around the shoulders and chest area).
What say you, folks? Leash, or not to leash child? (My own opinion is with the husband. Looks degrading).
posted on November 1, 2000 11:37:32 AM new
While I agree that it can "look" degrading, the safety of the child is the issue. Some children, especially those with special needs may require this type of harness. You can't always tell to look at a child if they fall into that catagory. I have two friends who have special needs kids. They are both now in their 20's. When they were little, they were quite difficult to keep up with, and if they got away from you it was dangerous for them. Harnesses were the best things for them. The one boy, at 20, still requires a leash or belt due to his autism. He can run like the wind also, no one in his family can easily catch him if he gets away.
Many kids without special needs can be quick to run off as well. I think parents need to be given the room to decide how to handle their own kids. (within reason and without abuse of course) Maybe this father who was compaining should be given the job of keeping track of this little girl for a couple of weeks all by himself.
posted on November 1, 2000 11:50:45 AM new
Hi Maui...I had to have a leash for my son. It was the kind that went from wrist to wrist, so it wasn't so much like a harness. But I was so thankful for it because when he learned how to walk, he hit the ground running and there was no way to keep up with him. I can't tell you how many times he had come close to being hit by a car. And that's with us within a six foot radius!
I remember one time in particular. We were flying from San Diego to Newark and had a stop over in LAX. I had his stroller that I was carrying on, as well as a diaper bag and his car seat. During our layover, I piled all the stuff in the stroller and let him walk so he could stretch his legs a little bit and hopefully tire him out for the flight. Had I not had that leash, there was no way I could have pushed the loaded stroller with one hand while keeping him next to me with the other. If he had gotten away, I would have had to leave everything in order to chase after him and hope it was all still there when I got back!
I agree with Meya that the safety of a child is paramount. I really don't care what it looks like to others. One day out with my son and that husband would be begging for some kind of containment option! hehe It sounds to me like he is NOT the primary caregiver for his child and does not go out in public with her often.
Just a note to add: I'm wearing the 2-piece green outfit today and getting tons of compliments!
posted on November 1, 2000 11:51:11 AM new
My little sister wore a harness and leash in public for awhile--she went through a phase where she refused to hold anyone's hand.
I would personally rather have a parent put a leash on their child than have to read about another child that got away from their parent momentarily and darted into traffic with grave consequences. It happened here several months ago...I think the little boy was about two or three when he was struck and killed, if memory serves.
posted on November 1, 2000 11:58:45 AM new
My daughter started walking when she was 7 months old. By the time she was 9 months she could go so fast she would make your head spin, she also had no sense.She also refused to be carried. We lived on a busy street. Never went out the front door without a leash on.
posted on November 1, 2000 01:30:50 PM new
Im so pleased your happy with the outfit njrazd!
I never used a leash. My son ran all over the place, but I was faster than he was. He didnt like it with me holding on to his hand either, but OH WELL, lol. I know the majority so far say leash, but I just cant see it. Not because of how it looks, per sey...I cant explain it. Just bothers me to see it. This is not counting special needs children...yes, they sometimes need restraints to keep them from hurting themselves. Guess Im in the minority.
But....I will post another moral court case here again soon. Some are very interesting, to say the least.
posted on November 1, 2000 01:52:05 PM new
I never had to use one with my kids but I've seen some that I thought would have been much safer with a leash. It's a case of better safe than sorry in some cases.
posted on November 1, 2000 02:02:49 PM new
When my son was very small he could disappear in a flash. He had no fear of strangers and enjoyed striking up conversations with the most unsavory of characters.
I bought one of those wrist leashes that looks like a coiled phone cord to use when we went to crowded places like the boardwalk or the mall.
I was very self-conscious about using it, but afraid not to. My son didn't like it. I told him it was to keep me from getting lost. We both survived.
posted on November 1, 2000 02:09:29 PM new
Once, while visiting my parents, we went to the Santa Cruz boardwalk. I stuck elder kitten-who was three at the time-in his little overalls and hooked an honest to gosh dog's leash around the back of his overalls. He hated it and we got a lot of odd looks but this was a child who could disappear in nothing flat if I let go of his hand for ten seconds, plus it was a crowded area right on the water and he wanted to be IN the water. I figured leashing him was far better than having him pulled free from me in the push of the crowd and then being unable to find him again.
And the younger kitten got his little vest the day I sat him on a stool and told him to stay put while I looked at ONE dress. I'd barely got the dress off the rack when there was an announcement over the PA that there was a lost little redhaired boy in the shoe department-which was clear across the store. I glanced down but I knew who it was. I was right. The kitten was gone. I retrieved him and headed straight for the children's department to buy a leash for him.
All it takes is to have a kid somehow disappear when you're out and about-and it's easy enough to happen, no matter how careful you are-and have no idea where to even start looking for the kid to make you appreciate the peace of mind a leash gives.
My three year old had a leash when she first learned how to wal..er, I mean, RUN. It was a Looney Tunes harness with Sylvester and Tweety on the front. Her Dad played soccer, ran track and wrestled and HE couldn't catch her when she took off.
She's really into sitting in a grocery cart now (SOMEONE up there likes me for once)..thankfully, because the little rascal learned how to undo the leash. We still do not take her anywhere unless it's the two of us TOGETHER to watch her.
posted on November 7, 2000 12:50:50 AM new
I agree, much more tragic to have a child lost, or heaven forbid, *stolen* from you! I caught someone once trying to remove my child from my shopping cart at a grocery store when I was reading a label on a can. Had my hand on the cart. He was 2ish, sitting in the basket. I turned because I heard him cry, the person let go and took off!!
My kids have always been either in a stroller or 'sling' carrier on my hip, up until age 3 or 4 or at the age where they could be trusted to hold my hand. If they weren't cooperative (and my 3 y.o. still isn't, just doesn't have that impulse control yet), we stick with the stroller, and if they for some reason disliked the stroller I would have NO problem with a 'leash' device. I could care less how it "looks".
I'm like you. Children in leashes always turned me off but after reading everyone's comments I see the importance of one. I have always found the type xardon used much less objectionable. I guess in my case leashes just remind me of dogs. I just never had problems with my children wandering off.
Now about leashes for husbands. Go to Wallyworld and the husband has to immediately go to the oil filter Dept. and takes forever to pick one out. After that he admires other boring things like shotgun shells etc. I get ALL of what I need and go looking for him. Humph, can't find him anywhere. How about shock collars for them?
posted on November 7, 2000 05:52:56 AM new
Hi Maui,
I had a terrible experience when son was small. I was writing a check in Walmarts when he was maybe 2. Got my first name written on check and looked. Son right beside me. Wrote middle and last and looked. Son gone. Clerks all left their registers to help me look. I would not leave the door area just in case someone tried to take him out. They ran next door to ask at the IGA. Some of the clerks came from there. Clerk finally found him sitting of all places at the comic book section sitting on display rack. It probably only took 5 minutes to find him but might as well have been an hour. I was lucky. Very Lucky. I understand now that our WalMarts has a lock down when a parent can't find their child.
We went to Silver Dollar City right after that. The morning we got up it dawned on me about how quick he was and how crowded SDC was. All we had was a dog leash and I took it. It had a clasp on the end and I attached it to his back belt loop. I was afraid of what people might say but we didn't care.
People actually came up telling me what a good idea. It gave him a little freedom and us the feeling of security that he would be safe.
I don't know how old your children are (mine 30,28 and son 23. Things changed drastically between the D's and S. Too many sicko's out there.
Not all children can be trusted. D's no problem. Son=NO. I have a GS just like him and I bought one of those wrist ones. Plan to use it this yr when we go to SDC to see the xmas lights.
When it comes to, "how bad it looks" or safety, I'll take safety. I also want to do the finger printing thing on the gk's.
posted on November 8, 2000 08:10:32 AM new
My oldest son is a special needs kid. When he was young there still wasn't much help out there for moms like me, not like today anyway...
I devised a leash/like thing when he was at his most risk taking dangerous stage. I was real poor then too, so I used a belt and dog chain...it looks horrible, really. I was really embarrased (young get embarrased) but I used it for a short time at places I had to take him that were high risk...maybe I had more guts then than I realized ...but you've just gotta protect your kids, no pride allowed.
Now he's a grown up risk taker...he doesn't remember the leash...he's bound to have a child with the genetic makeup he has...I wonder what he'll do?
. Havent been herei n awhile, and ran across a ponderment that was interesting. Today, on Moral Court, a man and his wife were on, he complaining that the wife was degrading their two year old daughter because she put the child on a leash when out in public. Compounding the issue was the fact that it WAS a leash, not a halter made for children, although both are similar in looks and how its attached (around the shoulders and chest area).
