posted on January 13, 2001 04:02:51 PM new
This is a kids say the darnedest things thread.
My 5 YO daughter had her 6 YO pal from school over today. They are best friends, my daughter is completely enamored with her, but at times she feigns indifference.
I adore this little gal, and here is why.
They were drawing with markers and instead she writes my daughter this note in BIG RED LETTERS where "XXX" is another child at school.
"XXXXXXX you are playing with XXX.
If you do not play with me I will punce you write in your gutts"
~~~~~~~~~~~
This gal is a Pisces but has an ARIES MOON and VENUS and will punce gutts in the game of love - no problem.
posted on January 13, 2001 04:33:19 PM new
VeryModern...This is soooo timely...I am not the typical "Oh, they say the cutest things" kinda mom, but last night as I was sitting at my computer I overhead my son & my husband discussing why the boy had a big stain on his sleeve...I tried real hard not to laugh (almost worked!)...&..I even quickly wrote it down & saved it....FWIW
My son, the boy who chooses to wear more of his food than he actually consumes, was explaining how his sleeve got a huge purple stain at school...."well, my arm went into some jelly at lunch, and well, um, it was like the jelly took control of my sleeve & wouldn't let go"....Tommy age 7
posted on January 13, 2001 04:39:03 PM new
When my younger brother (his name is Nick) wrote a letter to Santa he said he did want anything for himself. But his friend Nick wanted a set of drums and that Santa should give Nick the drums. He then signed his friends name to the letter.
posted on January 13, 2001 05:06:56 PM new
My 18y.o. daughter is training to be a Kindy - Pre school Teacher. She often comes home with funny stories, but the one I like the best is what is known as the 'marry me' twins.
There is a set of beautiful (but devilish) twins at the centre and they could not say her name so they called her 'marry me'. It was so adorable - she could be out at he shops and if the twins saw her all you would hear was 'marry me, marry me' until she answered them. She hated it, but as I told her she should think herself lucky, because not everyone gets proposed to by two adorable blue eyed blondes in one day.
They are now 3 and can say her name, much to her delight.
posted on January 13, 2001 05:18:47 PM new
About two months ago my 2 year old was at the relatives house. He is one of the youngest so the adults like to him to show his tricks when he is there. Finally after about 15 minutes of what is your name, can you say your abc's etc., they asked him what does a cow say?
He said "The cow says I don't wanna play anymore!"
posted on January 13, 2001 05:26:49 PM new
When my son was about 4 1/2 we took a trip to the supermarket to pick up a few small items. While standing in the express line he looked up at the checkout clerk and asked me, loud enough for everyone else in line to hear, if the clerk was a lady or a man. I said in a low voice that it was a lady. In the same voice he then asked, "Well, why does she have a moustache?" I didn't know what to say. I looked at the clerk ( who did have more than a little upper-lip fuzz) and attempted a half-assed smile but I could tell from her pained expression that we hadn't exactly made her day.
There was an extremely awkward silence as we continued to wait in the line. My son kept insisting on an answer which I was unable to provide. I wanted to flee but that didn't seem quite the thing to do. When it came our turn the clerk quickly tallied up the bill and all but threw my items in the bag. I thanked her, said "Sorry 'bout that", and left the store.
On the way home my son and I had a long talk about inappropriate comments.
The incident still stands as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life (my posts on this board excluded, of course).
posted on January 13, 2001 05:38:09 PM new
A favorite Nick story is when he started to sing along with the radio. At the time, the song "Prop Me Up Beside the Jukebox if I Die" was being played a lot.
And there was my little four year old...singing his heart out:
"Prop me up beside the juice box if I die..."
So far, the worst thing Maddie has done to me is pipe up LOUD in church "I gotta go potty NOW, Mom!" while we were in line for communion. heh Ah well, I figure God understands.
posted on January 13, 2001 05:38:26 PM new
Well, how about comments that older kids make? My 19 year old son had Out Patient surgery this morning to repair a small hernia.
They gave him some pre-meds to calm him down, and very pretty 21 year old nurse came to shave him a bit. He told her he had already done it a little, but she had to use clippers and shave some more.
He didn't say this to her, but said he thought about asking her to shave her name there.
I'm glad he kept it to himself.
He also said the ceiling tiles were moving, then asked if he could buy that medication at Rite Aid.
posted on January 13, 2001 06:30:10 PM new
I have another.
I have many many names / nicknames for both my children. Dozens for sure, maybe even 100.
So my daughter can be a true pain and when she gets "fresh" I sometimes call her "little chick" or little chickie".
This like a 70's slang thing.
Okay, so we are in the check out in a Target and I am on my last nerve.
She was 4 YO and has been on full tilt atrocious for hours.
So I am paying and she starts in and I wheel around "YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU LITTLE CHICKIE!"
Fast as lightning she answers back and mimicking my exact tone and intonation. "YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU BIG CHICKEN!"
I laughed till I cried.
And she likes to sing.
Just last week we were in a grocery store and she starts singing to her brother (21 month) in the aisle.
Top of her lungs and she sings as poorly as I do.
"YOU'RE a GREAT baby! YOU give a lot of LOVE!
I'll never call you a DRAGON or a SLUG!"
LA LA LA LA!
posted on January 13, 2001 07:07:47 PM new
I don't have kids but I love reading the things they say!
I have story kind of like Meya's. My neighbor was having minor surgery and since her hubby was in the military and away from home at the time, and she was somewhat shy and lonely, I volunteered to come along to keep her company. At the hospital, they prepared her by giving her some type of medication that was *supposed* to knock her out but just made her very, very woozy. There was a good looking young doctor checking on vital signs prior to her entering the operating room. She started commenting to me about this doctor in a loud voice, saying "Oooh, he's a hot one" and "Lookathere, now that's a nice butt". I about died of embarassment but the doctor just smiled and went about his business. Later when I told her what she had been saying, she was MORTIFIED---didn't remember a thing.
posted on January 13, 2001 07:29:01 PM new
Yup - I have had that unfortunate experience of coming out from under the drugs and it really is truth serum - there is a point floating there where you will just say whatever comes to mind. The first thing I saw when I came out was this really cute redheaded nurse with lots of freckles. Understand please I have this "thing" about freckles. I did inquire about them in some detail...
posted on January 13, 2001 09:03:58 PM new
Last December we were having an inspection done by a structural engineer, who was an older (60-something or better) man. My son, who had just turned five has gorgeous straight red hair and always gets comments on it. This nice man tries to make small talk with my son and asks him "Where did you get that red hair from?" With a straight face he deadpans "From the hair store."
Last week my almost 2 year old spewed what looked like a pound of curdled milk right in the middle of an aisle at the grocery store without warning. We went to the meat department to let them know there was a cleanup needed and also to get some paper towels. As I was cleaning off the 2 year old, his brother (now 6) says "Mommy, you have to go back and clean up the FLOOR!!!" He was not at all worried about his little brother, but he had all kinds of concern for the floor...
The 6 year old has ADHD and sometimes has trouble controlling himself. In public he blurts out things like "big butt! I am just waiting for the day that he does that near someone that it applies to and I have to try to worm my way out of it.
posted on January 14, 2001 06:30:21 AM new
Our oldest son was very curious as a child, always asking questions at time's I wish he hadn't.
xardon - Boy, can I identify with your story.
Once, in the check-out line at the grocery store, a very heavy woman, probably weighed around 350 #s, was right in front of me and my 4 year old son. Her rear was right at his eye level, and right in front of his face. I got a sinking feeling in my stomach that something was going to happen, as he didn't stop staring at her rear. I tried to divert his attention, but he was fixated on her. He tugged on my arm and pointed to her and in a very loud voice said, "Mom, look how fat that lady is." I bent over whispering in his ear that what he was saying might embarrass her, or hurt her feelings, and that we would talk about it when we left the store. But he was not going to wait until then. He continued with, "Maybe you should tell her if she didn't eat all those treats she won't be so fat." I glanced into her basket almost full with nothing but sweets, just as she was telling me what a rude child I was raising.
I apologized to her, but the damage was done.
Another time this same son (about 4 years old) was screaming in the living room that I needed to come, right away. I ran into the room to see him looking at a TV commercial where a very muscular, good looking, colored man was pitching his product. The screen was a head and shoulder shot of this man. The thought racing through my head was my son was going to ask a question about the color of this mans skin, so we'd obviously be having a discussion about different races. As I asked him what? what?....his statement was, "Look Mom, that man doesn't have any hair." The man in the commerical had a totally shaven head. LOL First time he had noticed a totally bald man.
I used to love watching Art Linkletter's show, and the take-off of that show years later. Each parent can probably identify with a child who's said something true, but embarassing when in public.
