Come on Spaz, yours was an opinion I really wanted to hear. You are probably wondering why. Maybe not but I'll tell you anyway. I respect your opinion and often share it on other subjects. You also don't seem to insult people and give good solid reasons for why you hold whatever opinion you do. I was looking forward to your answer.
posted on October 21, 2001 08:27:23 AM new
>>What shaped your thinking about homosexuality in general?<<
sorry, jt Baseball tournament this weekend so I can only pop in and out.
To answer your question:
I grew up on Long Island. Many of my friends chose a "sheltered" way of life. Lotsa money, lotsa privileges. Fantasy world and LaLaLand, so to speak.
I chose a different path. IMO, more realistic experiences. I hated high school, skipped often, and ended up dropping out 2 weeks before graduation. I was never one to play by the rules, but I've tried to live within the rules. I took my GED and went to college at the "regular" time. Upstate NY. College Softball was a big eye-opener for me. I was the only heterosexual on the team. It was no big deal, I had always thought of myself as open-minded. Some of my "teammates" had other ideas. Not a pretty experience. Suffice it to say, I learned to respect others and never try to change people. From any side, it is not fun to have someone's ideas forced upon you. I'm just me ~ accept me as I am or move on. In addition to "me being me", "you are you". I respect you for who you are, how you think, and the relationship we share. I am not in this relationship to change you.
Who you are attracted to, who you sleep with, or whether your inside & outside are of different gender doesn't come into play. That's part of the "you are who you are" (and I'm damn glad you are, BTW) I can feel with you and share with you, listen to you and talk to you.
I try not to be judgemental ~ I've seen to much pain caused to people who are "different". I believe that how we are "different" is what makes us so special.
jt, I don't know if I answered your question or if I possibly could without citing ten or twenty examples and experiences that I've had. Perhaps I have given you a peek at what shaped my views on homosexuality, perhaps you will only wonder why my experiences didn't incite me. I don't think an angry life is worth living
I'm not sure if I'm making sense...
posted on October 21, 2001 01:04:43 PM new
Thank you zoomin. Would the statement below also extend to those who hold a different view based on religious belief such as luvbugg above?
I respect you for who you are, how you think, and the relationship we share. I am not in this relationship to change you.
That question is not to provoke but is asked in genuine interest?
posted on October 21, 2001 01:24:30 PM new
>I respect you for who you are, how you think, and the relationship we share. I am not in this relationship to change you<
JT:
Yes, the statement extends to LuvBugg. S/He has a valid view whether it's basis is in religion, personal experience or otherwise. I admire that LuvBugg is open minded enough that friends would "be surprised" to find out some of her opinions. LuvBugg doesn't "force" a religious POV and appears to be non-judgemental ~ one of the traits I admire most
For me, the primary exception or limitation in I am not in this relationship to change you, is that I cannot be in a relationship with someone who feels they need to change me. I appreciate sharing life experiences and knowledge, I enjoy learning about what makes you who you are. Unfortunately (fortunately IMO, though), I have little tolerance for those who try to change me.
* btw, no provovation taken *
(edit out of respect for LuvBugg who I mistakely called LoveBugg)
[ edited by zoomin on Oct 21, 2001 01:29 PM ]
posted on October 21, 2001 01:46:04 PM new
LuvBugg:
>>I believe homosexuality to be a sin<<
IMO, that does not make you homophobic.
jt:
My exH thinks in terms of scientific evidence and facts. He is of the opinion that since homosexuals cannot procreate, it is either (1) a genetic mutation of nature to be homosexual or (2) not nature, but nurture that "creates" homosexuality.
His POV.
He worked as a phlebotomist doing blood work in the Village (NY) in the 70's and 80's. Few people were aware of AIDS, those who were aware called it "The Gay Man's Disease". Although he questions how being Gay comes to be, he does not judge people for their sexuality and never thought twice about working with this mysterious disease. I do not consider him to be homophobic.
There is nothing in me that needs to agree with him just as there is nothing inside of me that needs to change his thinking. I appreciate his perceptions and knowledge.
(considering what a selfish SOB he is, I am now patting myself on the back)
*