posted on July 15, 2002 11:25:17 AM new
Barb I do hope you keep us updated on how he settles in - I think it will be a REAL interesting story.
If the good die young I fear I am around for awhile. The stuff in my lungs is just scar tissue. Real ugly and enough to limit my capacity but won't kill me.
However the last two weeks I have been on restrictions for mt calories - did not cheat at ALL - in fact I ate 200 calories a day less than he allowed and lost zip - zero - not a pound. So he wants to do a gastric bypass on me.
I asked the wife what we will do to take care of her mother and she informed me she will drive her down to her brothers who takes her once every month or 6 weeks for a day and inform him he has her for a month. Doesn't matter what he wants she will be sitting on the porch. I'm not used to seeing her in that mode.
posted on July 15, 2002 01:51:26 PM new
>>I asked the wife what we will do to take care of her mother and she informed me she will drive her down to her brothers who takes her once every month or 6 weeks for a day and inform him he has her for a month. Doesn't matter what he wants she will be sitting on the porch.<<
Gravid:
Good for her. Long overdue.
Before you go under the knife... What would happened if someone rolled you over into a swimming pool everyday?
posted on July 15, 2002 06:27:24 PM new
<he qualifies through medicaid>
nycyn, I know I shouldn't have to justify my fathers' Medicaid status but I need to. He has had 4 back surgeries and more procedures done on his back than you will ever know. He now has degenerative spine disease and there is nothing more they can do for him. He fought for 3 years to receive the whopping $540 a month that he gets. I pay my taxes and that's where part of it goes. I also help pay for thousands of babies born to women who should have been sterilized long ago and for murderers and child molesters to have a gym and cable TV in prison but I don't have a say in that, do I? Yes, my father is a difficult man but if you've lived in chronic pain and the depression associated with it for over 20 years, you would probably also be difficult. He is not a drug addict. He is a man who has lived most of his life in pain and misery and if I can see him finally in a place where he can be comfortable and have some of the comforts that the rest of us take for granted so be it. I really don't care who pays for it. I understand your point of others who don't qualify. My mother worked over 45 years as a waitress and manager of the same restaurant for the $384 per month she gets. Try living on that and paying almost $500 a month for prescriptions, and that's after a discount. Thank goodness she had sense enough to save some of those tips she made. I got my father settled in today and when I left he was asleep and looked very comfortable. When I left him I went directly to our local community college and enrolled full time (at age 42) for the fall semester so I can make more money to pay more taxes so drug addicts, murderers and child molesters can have life a little easier. Oh yes, my father too. Thanks everyone for your posts.
posted on July 15, 2002 07:09:22 PM new
>>When I left him I went directly to our local community college and enrolled full time (at age 42) for the fall semester so I can make more money to pay more taxes so drug addicts, murderers and child molesters can have life a little easier.<<
But let's not be cynical! Remember, much more will be going to the defense of our democracy!
But seriously, you're going to school? How exciting! What are you after or what will you be taking? I think that is great.
posted on July 15, 2002 07:20:17 PM new
No need to justify anything. I just want a chuck of it too. I worked a long time too and am not embarressed to take some back. Got to looking at it recently and realized I have made well over a million dollars in my life. Too bad I had to spend most of it on boring things.
posted on July 16, 2002 03:11:31 AM new
I am enrolled in the Computer Information Technology. I was enrolled about 3 years ago but only took 3 night classes and my mom got sick so I had to quit. It was too hard to work full time and take care of a house, animals, and everything else. I figure all technology is based on computers these days so I might as well keep up with the times. I can still sell on Ebay part time to make a little extra money. It's a good thing I qualify for in-state tuition because I could never afford it if I didn't. I applaud all you parents who have scrimped and saved to send your kids to college. $964.00 for 14 credits and that doesn't include books. That's a lot of money to me. I'm using part of my retirement money from my previous job to do this. I'm scared but excited. Now I have to give notice at my present job and I dread it. I love the job and the people but I have no benefits. Gotta plan for the future. Barbara
I'm proud of ya. You go girl. You've got alot of life left. Yep, tuition stinks and books are worse but the education is worth it and there may be some programs out there to help with it.
posted on July 16, 2002 12:32:07 PM new
Boy, am I hearing a ton here that is familier. My wife's uncle lived in the same house his entire life. His mother died in 1974, and he was never taught to do anything, so he didn't. He couldn't figure out how to take out the garbage (paper, trash and rubbish), so he didn't. When the roof started leaking in 1979, he didn't know what to do about it, so he did nothing. The leak led to a hole, which led to dry rot, until the roof collapsed (over the bedrooms, kitchen, and bathroom). Still the water came in so the wood floors rotted and collapsed. To walk from one end of the house to another, you had to walk from one joist to another. The city tried to evict him so the turned off the water and power over a year ago (gas for heat has been out since the mid 1980's). By the time he came to "Visit" we found out he had pnumonia, the house was listed for a tax sale, and so on. My wife paid off the taxes (less then 24 hours before the auction), and had him sign the house over to her. She signed him up for Social Security, SSI, Medicare, Medical, and City Support Services. She found a care facility that took SS, SSI and gave a room, 3 meals a day, and $120 a month (he was working part time earning $75 a month... that was all he had for food and everything). She sold the house and bought a condo that we rented for a positive income of about $500 a month (used to get him anything he wants or need and to pay ourselves back the $15,000 we had to lay out pay off the taxes, pay off the city's legal bill in trying to evict him, and so on). He used to live 50 miles away, he is now about 5 miles, and we see him every week. I saw him smile for the first time in my life a few weeks ago. He no longer looks like a concentration camp refugee. If my wife had not been around to help him, he would be dead by now. Now we are pretty sure he is going to out live us (the place he lives serves vegetarian foods).
posted on July 16, 2002 06:29:15 PM new
"and he was never taught to do anything, so he didn't"
You are being more than kind. People do not hole up in a dark cold house and let it come down around their ears because they had never been taught what to do. Normal sane people will ask someone WHAT to do. This man had some major mental problems. That could of course have been from how he was raised - but I assume he once went out to school and perhaps even had a job once in the past?
Or did they keep him at hiome in a closet until they died?
