posted on November 10, 2002 12:41:31 PM new
Hello,
my 5th anniversary is coming up
this december,
and I'm out of ideas of what to buy for my husband, ladies, would you have any suggestions?
I already bought him expensive gold silver pen, two watches, both engraved, made to order pendant and a gorgeous bracelet.
(please no tie & socks gift baskets
little info, late 40's, software company
and no ineterst in movies.
thank you in advance,
any suggestion will be grately appreciated
posted on November 10, 2002 11:36:13 PM new
I always liked the gift I had once of a certificate to have 5 custom shirts made for me. I am hard to fit which makes it even nicer, but you get to pick the fabric, collar, style of pocket etc.
Otherwise I would have never had a 22/36 black silk shirt with black buttons no pockets and french cuffs, or a cream crepe shirt with pearl buttons, wide collar and puff sleeves.
Or a hand tailored tux is nice. So many people never own a tux just rent them and they rarely fit well or are of nice fabric.
posted on November 11, 2002 05:33:00 AM new
if you have been married to the same guy for 5 years,you can pretty much get away with doing anything you want,literally you can just hit him over the head with a skillet -it is the best wake up call men need.
posted on November 11, 2002 07:37:03 PM new
And, in keeping with the wood theme, for my husband, I would use the rolling pin that I mentioned before to clobber him for that clandestine rendezvous in the fine hotel with the sunken bath surrounded by candles and scented oils that he enjoyed with his mistress....the scene that junquemama described SO PERFECTLY!....hmmmm... Well, junquemama, now we know what you've been up to.
posted on November 12, 2002 02:08:59 PM new
well, we already did something like that for his B'Day, both the cabin and the hotel,
(no mistress invited!)
we travel for living so hotels are not very exciting,
Gravid, you're idea has something to it,
he can never buy pants that fit him
mlecher, hates golf,
has ton of my pics
it's not that I dont have imagination,
I'm out of options,
I think we already did everything!
that's why I was hoping for some creative suggestions.
I have to admit, I dont know what a rolling pin is..
posted on November 13, 2002 07:31:37 AM new
Usually it is men joking about violence toward women. Women joking about violence to men I discover is not any funnier to me.. I know I may be too serious and other will find it humorous. Having seen it done takes the fun out.
I went to a wedding where the young groom was speaking to a circle of friends before hand and he jokingly said he would just slap her around a little if she got "out of line" after they were married. The bride was a delicate little thing, smart as a tack, who I taught how to drive and looked at with affection almost like a daughter.
I told him I thought it was probably just nervous joking before the stressfull event, but....truth is if he took up that idea for real I would have to hurt him. His Dad who almost never has anything to say just looked at him and said: "Believe the man." He assured us he was just joking.
When I was married to my first wife we had only been married a month or two when we had a really minor disagreement about something and she balled up her fist and tried to slug me. I caught her hand and stopped the swing but I explained to her that I would never hit her - and I never did in 5 years - but that meant she did not hit me. Now I explained - I am going to let go, and you can keep trying to hit me. But I will treat you like a equal and hit back. If you really think you want to trade blows with me one on one swing away. She did reconsider what a bad idea that was.
I suppose it was because she came from a large family where the kids did often fight with each other. As an only child that appaled me.
posted on November 13, 2002 09:14:04 AM new
I Suppose I shouldn't joke about such things. I wouldn't hurt a flea, gravid.
It amazes me though that some people who take the mention of violence so seriously would not hesitate one second to use it when it's considered favorable to them personally.
posted on November 13, 2002 01:36:33 PM new
Perhaps I do take it more seriously because I know I am capable of it.
People who claim they are not capable of violence worry me I admit. I suspect they don't know their own nature.
I'd rather deal with someone that will attempt to resolve things first without force and regards it as an unsatisfactory last choice.
I know I can try to reach an accord with someone like that before we clash.
I too easily picture the avowed pacifist all splattered with blood asking "Oh my who did this?" in a confused haze of denial after they went postal.
posted on November 13, 2002 02:36:22 PM new
Gravid,
I understand perfectly what you are saying.
All physically healthy individuals are "capable" of violence but a mentally healthy individual will only resort to violence under unusual circumstances such as self defence against a violent aggressor. Even pacifists will defend themselves under such circumstances.
Although going postal may involve repressed anger over a long period of time, I have not read any psychological correlation between Pacifism and "going postal".
posted on November 13, 2002 04:35:11 PM new
It would probably be dificult to seriously study. I think we essentially agree. You express it different.
I do hate to see the idea so promoted by example in movies and TV that force is the quicker easier way to solve problems.
Sometimes violence is the only solution left and it is actually worse to apply it half heartedly. But it is usually as you intimated the result of being in a situation were you are dealing with a mentally defective person.
posted on November 13, 2002 05:18:02 PM new
For a thread that started about an anniversary gift, it sure got off track. Seriously, it seems a joke when a woman threatens violence against a man, (rolling pin, skillet or whatever) but when the joke is reversed, it becomes no joke.
I was sitting in a auto dealership waiting room when a woman employee walked by, joking with a male employee. She reached out & kiddingly slapped him on the shoulder.
I remarked to the other people in the waiting room, if a woman (even jokingly) "assualts" a man, it is O.K., but if in the same extent a man "assualts" a woman it is wrong or sexist.
All agreed with me, (even the women), that there seems to be a dual standard in situations like this.
Although it is not a widely published, there are several thousand cases yearly of domestic abuse where the woman beats the hell out of their male spouses.
I have been involved in three fights/incedents as a adult. All were when I witnessed a man striking a woman.
That is something I will not stand by and watch without intervention.
Let get back to exploring options for laiochka.
If you wish to continue the "rolling pin" issue lets start a new thread.
posted on November 13, 2002 05:40:19 PM new
but I still dont know what the rolling pin is
i'm from Europe, so please forgive me,
I have no idea what it could be ...
i just watched a movie with a abusive husband
not even 3 hours ago...and now I came to read the replies and I found the same topic here.
(the wife and the child were eventualy saved from him but it was awfull )
i'm going crazy, please please
please guys help me,
any ideas will be appreciated.
i'm considering the made to measure clothes
but then also Chahukah is two weeks before my anniversary so I have to buy somnething for that too
I love getting presents, but I have the hardest time buying them
posted on November 13, 2002 06:13:05 PM new
laiochka
In the U.S. a rolling pin is a kitchen tool used flatten dough for pies, rolls & "Etc". In cartoons here a mad wife chases her husband with a "rolling pin" out of her kitchen when he had done something wrong.
Why not just ask your husband what he needs or would like for a anniversary present. He may have something in mind that he wants but is hesitant to buy for himself.
AND THANKS HELEN (see I got it right this time)
[ edited by bear1949 on Nov 13, 2002 06:15 PM ]
posted on November 13, 2002 07:52:49 PM new
This thread reminded me that I needed to order something for my wife's birthday which is a little less than two weeks away, so I did. Now all I have to do is find a card.
As to a gift for your husband, one gift that never fails with me is good books. So if he likes to read, that might be an option.
posted on November 14, 2002 12:07:16 PM new
Sorry I did go on a bit.
I don't have a wood suggestion. I never followed the traditional list of what you give for each year.
I may give other gifts but I always give my wife gold jewelry each year. Sometimes it is commercial sometimes things I have made myself. She has no costume jewelry it is all real. Last year she returned the favor and gave me a beautiful heavy 18Kt loop in loop neck chain.
One thing I personally would like as a gift is one of the new plasma screen TV/monitors.
You can get a 42 inch one now for about $3,000 which is a big drop. We have a small condo and it would open the living room up and make it easy to move the furniture around differenbt ways if we had the TV hanging (securely) on the wall instead of taking up floor space.
And they are real easy on the eyes since there is no flicker at all.
posted on November 14, 2002 01:41:02 PM new
Gravid
The jewlery that you have made yourself is the only kind of gift that I would value. Stuff bought from a store would generally have no value to me. For that reason, my husband and I have chosen not to exchange gifts.
My favorite gifts are pieces of art and poems that my children wrote and gave to me....worth more than anything that Tiffany & Co. has to offer!!!
So my suggestion is give nothing unless it is especially unique with value not determined by cost.
posted on November 14, 2002 11:08:20 PM new
Maybe find a company or someone who carves and get them to do up a special wooden plaque or a frame. Do you two share a favorite saying or a special song? You could have the saying or a line from the song carved into it.
Woods vary in cost and can be trimmed or lettered (instead of carved) with any metal ranging from brass to real gold so this can be done to suit almost any budget.
posted on November 15, 2002 06:24:09 AM new
Kraftdinner...lol...In case of fire there's not much that I would carry out. I like your idea of the shrubs and trees! One of my daughters planted a cherry tree for me.
