posted on September 8, 2001 09:09:51 AM new
These are a laugh riot, and all have been seen. They are listed on my family website. If anyone has any to add, please feel free to do so.
1. "Frankly, Scallop, I Don't Give a Clam" (seen on Cape Cod)
2. "That's It! I'm Calling Grandma!" (seen on an 8 year old)
3. "Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up"
4. "Procrastinate Now"
5. "Rehab Is for Quitters"
6. "My Dog Can Lick Anyone"
7. "I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts - Do You Want Fries With That?"
8. "Party - My Crib - Two A.M." (on a baby size shirt)
9. "Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been Doing Since
15"
10. "ALL MEN ARE IDIOTS, AND I MARRIED THEIR KING"
11. "West Virginia: One Million People, and 15 last names"
12. "FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION. It comes bundled with the software"
13. "I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN AND I'VE GOT A GUN"
14. "A hangover is the wrath of grapes"
15. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance"
16. "STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!"
17. "DISCOURAGE INBREEDING - BAN COUNTRY MUSIC!"
18. MOOSEHEAD: A great beer and a new experience for a moose"
19. "They call it "PMS" because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken"
20. "He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead"
21. "Time's fun when you're having flies.......Kermit the Frog"
22. "POLICE STATION TOILET STOLEN .... Cops have nothing to go on."
23. "FOR SALE: Iraqi rifle. Never fired. Dropped once."
24. "HECK IS WHERE PEOPLE GO WHO DON'T BELIEVE IN GOSH"
25. "A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, but it uses up a thousand
times the memory."
26. "The Meek shall inherit the earth....after we're through with it."
27. "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."
28. "HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment
for a pig."
29. "WELCOME TO KENTUCKY - Set your watch back 20 years."
30. "The trouble with life is there's no background music."
31. "IF THERE IS NO GOD, WHO POPS UP THE NEXT KLEENEX?"
32. "Suicidal Twin Kills Sister By Mistake!" 33. "The original point-and-click interface was a Smith and Wesson."
34. "MY WILD OATS HAVE TURNED TO SHREDDED WHEAT"
35. "Computer programmers don't byte, they nybble a bit."
36. "My truck does not leak, it's marking it's territory."
37. "MOP AND GLOW - Floor wax used by Three-Mile-Island cleanup team."
38. "NyQuil-The stuffy, sneezy, why-the-hell-is-the-room-spinning medicine."
39. "Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."
40. "My wife and I divorced over religious differences. She thought
she was God, and I didn't."
Rick
edited because my cut-n-paste missed 2 letters on the edges
In the begining, God created the heavens and the earth.
[ edited by ddicffe on Sep 8, 2001 09:20 AM ]
posted on September 8, 2001 09:15:31 AM new
Good Morning, Rick!
Thanks for the giggle!
"Don't Drink and Drive.
You might hit a bump and spill your drink."
only ZOOMIN here
posted on September 8, 2001 09:16:52 AM new
Ya gotta love those T's. I have "Frankly Scallop I don't give a clam."
And another with chickens in a conga line
entitled: Poultry in Motion
************************************
See this great T shirt, I got it for my Husband....
NICE TRADE!!
************************************
If you Drink Don't PARK! Accidents Cause PEOPLE!
posted on September 8, 2001 10:50:25 AM newBunni
Yanno, if we memorized them by the number than we could save a lot of time and just type 24, 34, 40 and get really great laughs!!
posted on September 8, 2001 03:11:01 PM new
A t-shirt I used to have in my old protest days.
The next war won't decide who's right but who's left
Bob, Downunder but never down.
posted on September 8, 2001 06:12:43 PM new
One of my favorite t-shirts is one I got years ago at an Inkslinger's Ball (tattoo convention). I wish I could find another one to buy because mine has become worn faded & tatty over the years.
Things I know you'd like to ask...
Yes, it hurt.
Yes, it was expensive.
Yes, I would do it again.
No, I didn't get them all at once.
No, I'm not sorry.
No, I didn't do it myself.
No, I wasn't drunk.
No, they don't come off.
I know what you're thinking & the answer is...maybe!
Why?...Why not!
posted on September 8, 2001 07:24:59 PM new
The burning question is,Bunni how do you feel when people read your chest?
I forgot when I was wearing the Frankly scallop shirt...we were going sailing, unfortunately the captain ran aground and I had to take a ferry into the city, use the MBTA, not a happy camper and everyone was staring at me! I had to laugh when I finally got to a ladies room and looked in the mirror at the shirt!
posted on September 8, 2001 08:35:54 PM new
My fav T's from many days gone by:
Love me, squeeze me, take me home
Prevent forest fires, eat your roach (my friends shirt, our parents had NO CLUE what it meant, so they let her wear it!)
Hang in there (with little kitty hanging on)
I'm a legend in my own mind (given to an old friend)
I can't be fired, slaves must be sold (worn on my last day at THAT job!)
Remember when sex was dirty and the air was clean?
Some I've seen around recently:
Depression: Anger without energy
Red meat isn't bad for you. Fuzzy, green meat is bad for you
Bad Cop, Bad Cop, NO DONUT!
Brain cells come & go, but fat cells are forever
Always proofread. You might have something out.
Some days it feels like all I'm doing is rearranging chairs on the deck of the Titanic
You can't scare me, I have children
The opinions of the husband of this house are NOT necessarily those of management
Some days, it's just not worth gnawing through the straps
Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be Evil.
CARPE BANDWIDTH!
Computers aren't intelligent. They just think they are
Computers are vehicles for the mind. They drive you crazy!
Procrastinate Later
Men: Can't live with 'em, Can't shoot 'em
Use your head, it's the little things that count!
Life is like a piano, what you get outta it depends on how you play it.
The best things in life aren't things
To this day, when visiting the local flea market, which is full of t-shirt vendors, I stand and read each shirt, chucking to myself every time!
posted on September 9, 2001 09:50:32 AM new
Being in the screen printing business, I have seen many over the years ... and wish I could have known about eBay and saved those doggone old transfers!
My absolute favorite of all:
(Insert picture of fat biker with long beard who hasn't taken a bath in a long time sittin on a Harley, of course )
Gas, Grass, or Azz
No one rides for free!
BECKY
Edited to add:
Johnstown, PA
FLOOD FREE MY AZZ!
This was after being called the Flood Free City for years .... right after the 1977 flood these were popular. Mom has a license plate with that on her van. It has gotten her out of at least one parking ticket!
[ edited by MrsSantaClaus on Sep 9, 2001 09:52 AM ]
Bunni
)
[ edited by MrsSantaClaus on Sep 9, 2001 09:52 AM ]