Bear1949
|
posted on November 22, 2004 01:42:12 PM new
Works for me.
1 cup of water
1 cup of sugar
4 large eggs
2 cup of dried fruit
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
1 cup brown sugar
Lemon juice
Nuts
1 FULL bottle of your favorite whiskey
Directions:
--------------------
1. Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
2. Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again to be sure that it is of the highest quality.
3. Pour one level cup and drink. Repeat.
4. Turn on the electric mixer; beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
5. Add one tsp. sugar and beat again.
6. Be sure the whiskey is still okay. Cry another tup.
7. Turn off the mixer.
8. Break two legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
9. Mix on the turner.
10. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
11. Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.
12. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something.
Who cares.
13. Check the whiskey.
14. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
15. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.
16. Grease the oven.
17. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
18. Don't forget to beat off the turner.
19. Throw the bowl out the window.
20. Check the whiskey again. Go to bed.
Who the heck likes fruitcake anyway?
Americans again prove Pres Bush is the best man for the job
"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself." --John Stuart Mill
|
Linda_K
|
posted on November 22, 2004 02:04:39 PM new
LOL bear....and just how many fruitcakes do you plan to make this year?  lol
When our mother died...all three of us girls took her rum fruitcake recipe, held a little 'sorry' Mom ceremony and burndt the dang thing. We HATED fruitcake. But now I think I might understand just why SHE liked making them. 
|
Bear1949
|
posted on November 22, 2004 02:20:06 PM new
Working on my 1st case of 24, haven't figured out why all of they have burned.
Americans again prove Pres Bush is the best man for the job
"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself." --John Stuart Mill
|
neroter12
|
posted on November 22, 2004 02:38:04 PM new
Linda, somebody must like fruitcakes! They keep making em!
|
maggiemuggins
|
posted on November 22, 2004 02:57:50 PM new
I love fruitcake!!!!
My birthday is a couple of days after Christmas.. and I always had a Fruitcake as my Birthday Cake.. LOL.. For years I thought it was a very special cake made just for my birthday..lol..
When I got older..I realized that the fruitcake and Christmas gifts were held over..hee hee...SNEAKY BUGGERS
|
Linda_K
|
posted on November 22, 2004 03:14:52 PM new
Well, neroter, they sure like them here in N. AR. they're on every table for any function that serves food. Just like their hush puppies....and fried okra. Yuck to all, imo. If I could drink alcohol again, I'd drink it straight from the bottle...not get it from a nasty old [who knows how many times it's been passed around] fruitcake.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Four More Years....YES!!!
|
neroter12
|
posted on November 22, 2004 03:19:27 PM new
not get it from a nasty old [who knows how many times it's been passed around] fruitcake. ......
LOL,Linda!!
|
neroter12
|
posted on November 22, 2004 03:22:03 PM new
maggie, we will have to have a virtual online birthday party for you! (The days are going by faster it seems to me. I bet holidays will be here and gone before we know it.)
|
yellowstone
|
posted on November 22, 2004 03:36:35 PM new
And who is going to want to do the spanking at the virtual online birthday party for Maggie.....how old did she say she was.....that's how many swats??
--------------------
Here's my favorite fruitcake recipe;
Items Needed:
4 Oz. Fruit Bits
1 Railroad Tie
Wood Saw
Large Rubber Mallot
Safety Goggles
1 Large Bottle of Whiskey
WEAR YOUR SAFETY GOGGLES. (Children: Get help from an
adult!)
Cut a one-foot section from the middle of your railroad tie.
The resulting
block of wood should be the size and shape of a loaf of
bread.
Then, take some fruit bits and pound them into the block
with your rubber
mallot. Spread the colors around, or you might wind up with
an ugly fruitcake. Don't be afraid to throw some elbow grease
into that mallot!
Good fruit bits should be much harder than the railroad tie,
so you can't
break anything.
For best result, you should pre-treat the fruit bits by
setting them on
top of your garage for a year (or by microwaving them on
HIGH for 30
minutes).
Finally, cover it tightly in plastic wrap, and give your
loved ones the
timeless and enduring gift of fruitcake!
Now you can open that bottle of whiskey and put it to good use rather than wasting it on a dern fruitcake.
|
classicrock000
|
posted on November 23, 2004 03:41:30 AM new
" Linda, somebody must like fruitcakes! They keep making em!"
yea I thinks its Logansdad
|
neroter12
|
posted on November 23, 2004 05:49:04 AM new
lol yellowstone, I can envision you in your saftey googles destructing your fruit cake! ha-ha-ha..what a funny thought! 
|
maggiemuggins
|
posted on November 23, 2004 10:45:09 AM new
And who is going to want to do the spanking at the virtual online birthday party for Maggie.....how old did she say she was.....that's how many swats??
Dang..I'd be black and blue all over..how many swats? Well.. let's see, I was born in 1930, so you do the math.
That would be like Senior Abuse!
A truly wise man does not play leapfrog with a Unicorn!
|
fenix03
|
posted on November 23, 2004 10:54:08 AM new
::Just like their hush puppies....and fried okra. Yuck to all, imo.::
OK I can go with the yuk on the fried okra but how in the world do you "yuk" Hush Puppies? Deep fried cornbread, slathered with butter when still warm on the side of some fresh catfish and slaw....... Damnit... now I am hungry again....
~~~ • ~~~ • ~~~ • ~~~ • ~~~
If it's really "common" sense, why do so few people actually have it?
|
parklane64
|
posted on November 23, 2004 11:01:36 AM new
If you want to be an ecologically sensitive plugandsocket challenged individual, you are welcome to spare a gerbil and use a fruitcake.
__________
The Democrats were rejected by a majority of Americans
[ edited by parklane64 on Nov 23, 2004 11:01 AM ]
|
Linda_K
|
posted on November 23, 2004 11:53:01 AM new
fenix - Well...I'll give you a 'yuk' you can use on me. We all have always loved cornbread and I've tried many different recipes. But my family's favorite has always been "Jiffy" cornbread mix. LOL Okay....where's your 'yuk'? lol
But these things...I don't know. Everybody has their own 'passed down' recipe for them and they load them with onions and other spices and...just not my cup of tea.
Now...catfish...we've got some neighbors that make catfish like I've never tasted in my life. Didn't use to care for it at all...but love it now. Our neighbors have a twice-a-year get-together and we all bring different types of lake caught fish....and oh it's all to die for. [I buy mine from our fish store ] My favorite is orange scruffie...blackened in a cast-iron skillet...oh....I could eat a pound of that myself.
And of course, we have many restaurants around here that serve catfish...it's a staple around here.
|
funkikitti
|
posted on November 29, 2004 07:56:21 PM new
OK fruitcake --NASTY!! I'll agree, here in AR they are everywhere!! Even in the malls starting around Halloween--GROSS!!
Now, as for hushpuppies, I can deal with those, I just hate the ones with burnt onions in them. Fried okra is good done right, just don't burn it. Catfish is great if it's not muddy.
Whoever mentioned Jiffy cornbread-- have you ever made pancakes with it? They are wonderful!!
|
maggiemuggins
|
posted on November 29, 2004 07:59:51 PM new
Fried okra is good done right
Anyone who eats okra will eat sh!t and bark at the moon!! JMHO.. LOL
Maggie
[ edited by maggiemuggins on Nov 29, 2004 08:00 PM ]
|
funkikitti
|
posted on November 29, 2004 08:04:36 PM new
I'll agree with part of it--BOILED okra is worse than SH!T that slimey nasty assed snotty feelin' crap!!
|
maggiemuggins
|
posted on November 29, 2004 08:07:43 PM new
Well said.. carry on! LOL
Edited to add... send me your unwanted fruitcakes.. I love fruitcake!
[ edited by maggiemuggins on Nov 29, 2004 08:08 PM ]
|
